Saturday, October 19, 2019

What if I Don't Feel at Peace?

Recently, something happened that upset me. Just another ripple in the story of life, but it bothered me more than some things do. While I was in the midst of dealing with my feelings about that situation, I read a quote that one of my friends posted on Facebook. Without quoting it directly (because I don't know who to attribute the quote to), the basic take-away from it was that the peace of God doesn't change our circumstances but rather changes us. I know this to be true. Although this wasn't the first time I had read or heard a statement like that, on this instance it lead me to think a little deeper. The Bible references God as "the God of peace" more than once (see Romans 15:33 and Romans 16:20, for example). If He is the God of our lives and He is the God of peace... What if I don't feel at peace? What is peace?

First, peace isn't necessarily a feeling. I feel at peace when I've chosen to take myself outside to a quiet spot far from the pressures of everyday life. Then I feel a stillness and relaxation that goes down deep and releases built up tension and anxiety. The beauty of God's creation surrounds me and the worries of the world seem to fall away in the light of my great Father.

Bighorn National Forest, Wyoming
I experience the same feeling when I'm the only one awake in the house early in the morning, listening to the wind outside. Or when I'm curled up in a cozy chair with a good book. Unfortunately, I can't camp out in those spots forever. At some point I have to come back to earth, so to speak, and deal with life in all its ups and downs. Where is the peace that "surpasses all understanding" now? I don't FEEL at peace now. Now that I have to take care of kids with colds, tackle mountains of laundry, trip over discarded toys... pay an unexpected bill, set aside a dream, put off a long-awaited vacation... deal with a health crisis, grieve a loss, walk alongside a friend who is hurting, solve a conflict with my spouse...? Life is messy! And yet, knowing everything that we have faced and will ever face, the Lord, who loves us beyond measure, tells us in His Word that we can have peace in spite of it all.

"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, 
will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4: 7 (ESV)

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.
In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
- John 16: 33 (NIV)

Among the definitions of the word "peace" in Thayer's Greek Lexicon we find this: "of Christianity, the tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and content with its earthly lot, of whatsoever sort that is." "The tranquil state of a soul..." What is our soul? Basically, as I have heard it defined, our soul is our mind, will, and emotions. We already know that sometimes our emotions don't feel at peace. What about our mind and our will?

I think, more than just a feeling, peace is knowledge. Peace is the knowledge that even if I am not okay today... I will be, sometime. Peace is the knowledge that God is faithful to a level even beyond our human understanding. Peace is the knowledge that God is completely trustworthy. Knowing and believing these things (and allowing God to work in our lives) transforms us from the inside out. It's normal to feel sad, hurt, and broken. It's normal to feel anxious, agitated, and tense. It's normal to feel fearful, upset, and confused. It's part of being human! God knows it. He made us and He didn't make a mistake. I don't believe that having peace means the total absence of these negative emotions. Peace comes when we acknowledge with our mind that God is in control and His plans for our life are good. Choosing to align our will with God's will opens the door for Him to transform us, eventually bringing peace to our emotions even when it seems far from our natural reach.

"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you."
- Isaiah 26: 3 (NIV)

"The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace."
- Psalm 29: 11 (NIV)

Last year, I wrote a post about how peace is powerful, refreshing, and overwhelming. Peace is active, not passive. Peace is like a river, and the river is MOVING - it's not still or stagnant. Peace goes beyond the surface - beyond the circumstances - beyond the feelings and emotions. Peace goes DEEP. God's peace fills in the cracks left by our brokenness and holds the pieces together.

He is the creator of the entire universe, and HE holds US together.

I know that I can't do this life without Him. I can't piece my life back together by myself when something unexpected happens, shakes me to the core, and pieces fall to the ground. When the peace that I feel is shattered, He replaces it with peace that isn't necessarily felt at a surface level right away. A peace that transforms. A peace that "surpasses all understanding." A peace that provides a solid place for my feet to stand on while things swirl out of control all around me, and even within my own heart. A peace that outlasts the storm. And for that, I'm grateful.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, 
so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
- Romans 15: 13 (NIV)